Tuesday, October 2, 2012


The Lord has been doing some major changes in our lives, teaching us some deep lessons that I would like to share. Up until June the Lord had been teaching us to trust Him in a very simple way. The bills would come in, they would be paid. He always brought the work in time. Always. Sometimes the very day something was due we would have no way of knowing how to pay it but always before the day was over the money was there to cover it. I finally came to the place of just trusting Him, if an anxious thought arose it quickly was sent away by the realization that God always provided for us. Always. Then June rolled around. We sent out our monthly checks like before and one after the other they were returned because of “Insufficient funds”. No work, no reprieve, nothing. I was totally shocked. How could God allow us to arrive at that kind of trust and then BOOM, drop the bottom out from under us? Had we sinned? Was it a test (for what)? Why??? We waited and struggled to find enough work to put food on the table as well as pay some of the bills and the multiple fees associated with an overdrawn bank account. July, same story. It did not make sense to me, I know God does all things well, but this just did not add up.  The Lord revealed to me that I had become angry with God. That sobered me greatly and made me fall on my face before Him, begging for some sort of understanding, pleading for peace. I went to my husband for help, asking him “why?” his answer was so simple, yet so profound. “Even when we don’t understand, we need to trust the Lord. It is not always going to be easy to trust Him like it has been but we should trust Him even in the hard times. Whenever doubt comes in, take it to the Lord right away.” So I began to pray about that, especially “even in the hard times”. Then the Lord reminded me of Job. WOW! God allowed everything to be taken from Job, even his children, and it was still for God’s glory. Job basically answered the same way I did…paraphrasing... “Why, what have I done? I am innocent.” Yet Elihu rebuked him and his rebuke now stung me as well….

“Behold, in this thou art not just: I will answer thee, that God is greater than man. Why doest thou strive against him? For he giveth not account of any of his matters.” (Job 33:12) and in 34:5. “For Job hath said, I am righteous: and God hath taken away my judgment.” V. 10 “…far be it from God, that he should do wickedness; and from the Almighty, that he should commit iniquity.” V.23. “For he will not lay on man more than right; that he should enter into judgment with God.” V.29. “When he giveth quietness, who then can make trouble? And when he hideth his face, who then can behold him? Whether it be done against a nation, or against a man only:” vs. 31-32. “Surely it is meet to be said unto God, I have borne chastisement, I will not offend any more: That which I see not teach thou me: if I have done iniquity, I will do no more.”

The Lord is bringing us into a new level of trust. Up until now we trusted that He would provide. Now He wants us to trust Him even if He does not provide. Is our faith conditional? Will we only praise Him when things go our way? Or will we still trust and praise Him when it seems like everything is falling apart and we are faced with losing everything? Our dear Lord Jesus Christ has a plan and purpose in all things that He does and in what He allows to happen. Romans 8:28 says “And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.” Does that mean that everything will go the way we want it to? No. All things work for our good, even what seems “bad” works for our good. God is bringing glory to His name and He has many ways of doing that. If teaching us to praise Him even in the hard times will bring Him more glory, than I rejoice and am very thankful for this deep lesson He is teaching us! Growth is painful, but oh how blessed we are that He is willing to allow us to go through painful times that we can grow through it. Praise Him! Praise our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ!!! He is worthy of all praise and honor! Sing to Him, offer a sacrifice of praise, He is worthy! (Hebrews 13:15)

Friday, September 28, 2012


So much for me posting more often :) Life gets busy and training even one little girl is a great task and responsibility from our Heavenly Father. So the blog can wait...even the dishes can wait if need be, except for the fact that they are part of the training. :) Grace now can stand on a chair beside me and "help" do the dishes, cook, bake, clean. Whatever I am doing I try to include her. It is not always easy and I am by no means doing so all the time or even as much as I would like to, but it really amazes me how much the Lord keeps reminding me..."why are you doing this by yourself?" It also is a great encouragement to see how happy she is when working along side me, she is just bubbling with excitement over being included in real life! Oh how we pray for her that she will come to love and serve our Lord Jesus Christ at an early age, that He would save her and bring much glory to His worthy name through her life! We also pray this for our dear little one who is now due in less than a week!

I have been "nesting" for several weeks now, changing things around in our home with my husbands help....I should rephrase that... Patrick changes things around while I point where I would like them to go. :) He is so wonderful and uncomplaining about my sudden ideas, and usually refines them to a better way of managing our space, or comes up with his own. I am truly blessed to be married to such a great man! We are so excited as we wait to meet our little boy or girl, though I am somewhat nervous about the labor since Grace's was so long. Yet I know the Lord will give me the strength for whatever He allows, I just cannot dwell on it too much, just trust in Him who does all things well.

Grace loves babies! Every morning she has to greet her three baby dolls with squeals of delight and exclamations of "baby! baby!" She cares for them so lovingly, rocking, singing and changing them. We really look forward to how she will be with her little brother or sister, it will be such fun to watch! I have to run, but here are a few random pictures.....

Sunday, April 29, 2012

Snap Shots of our Life

Hello everyone it sure has been a long time since I have written anything on here! I do not have much time but want to make a short update...During the past (almost) year my husband stopped building sheds since the company he was working for began to short us large amounts on his paychecks. We started a company as a family hauling all over the US and added many new States to our "been there" list. Lately the Lord has led us to do more local hauls as Grace is growing quickly and it is very hard for her to take long trips now that she is mobile. Though in the past few weeks people have been calling us from all over wanting things hauled and we end up making more than when we were looking for things to ship! We have taken note of the fact that this has happened only after we each (separately) "let go" of our ideas of what God wanted us to do and just let the Lord show us day by day what to do next. We are overcome with the peace He has given us now! No longer are we saying "we need to pay these bills so we have to look for shipments that will meet our needs". We just say "what should we do Lord?" and everything is met without all the worry and stress! I am so thankful that He is so patient and has brought us to this point. Thank you Lord Jesus!!! Our God is faithful and delights to care for His sheep.
 We are much closer to moving our mobile home to our property! I can hardly wait for that! and..... We are expecting a new little one the beginning of October!!!! We are so excited and praising our Lord Jesus for His great blessings on us! I love being a Mommy...no I said that wrong... I LOVE being a Mommy!! There are so many challenges and we are learning so much as Grace grows and learns, I wish I had time to share what the Lord has been teaching us. Our lives seen to be a whirlwind of activity and I am so grateful to our Lord for the quite times He gives us to seek Him. I could not survive otherwise, He is everything we need and indeed everything we have. Praise Him!!!

I must go now but here are some pictures recapping the year:

A visit to Wisconsin in October! We were able to share the gospel at the Bayfield Apple Fest

Grace's first time at Lake Superior

Enjoying time together! :)

Grace and Nana!

Playing with Grandpa!

With Daddy on the skid loader :)

October 26th Grace is 7 months old!

While visiting with family in Colorado Springs, CO in December, they took us to see "The Garden of the Gods" It has a strange name but what a wonderful place to see the beautiful creation of our God!

Patrick and I at the "Balanced Rock"!

Grace on the military tank :)

This tank is the reason we were out West. We hauled it from Ohio to Idaho. It was quite the adventure!

Patrick and Grace in Yellowstone National Park!

We did not realize that they close Yellowstone to "tired" vehicles in the winter until we got there and did not get to see much before a park ranger told us we had to leave. It was beautiful though!

On our way back home we stopped to visit my family again! :) Here is Uncle Michael playing the piano with Grace :)

Lifting a skid loader out of our truck in Indiana

Skipping ahead a few months...March 10th 2012... Grace in Birmingham, AL enjoying the warm sunshine

We hauled this load of flooring down there

Not so sure about being bare foot on the ground :)

The warm weather spoiled us, it was so beautiful!

Patrick and Grace :)

Back home again, Grace is showing off her teeth :)

She absolutely loves to read!

Grace's Birthday! March 26, 2012  It is so hard to believe she is one year old! Can you tell she is enjoying her balloon?! :)

Best of all Grandpa and Nana were able to make it down for her big day! Thank you Lord Jesus!

Grandpa points our something of interest


Too much fun!

Grace was eating it up!

Ready for work around the house :)

Reading with Daddy :)

We love you so much!!!

So hard to say goodbye

Here we are hiking at Mohican Sate Park April 1st

At the Dam

That is all for now I hope to update more often... May our dear Lord Jesus be glorified in all that we do and say! Praise Him forever!

Friday, July 22, 2011

Flea Market Anyone?

My husband and I are homeless, well practically. BUT we do own a flea market. Is that news to you? It is to us too. We welcome you all to come on in and pick up as many fleas as you can attract before leaving. We would be happy to share the wealth of our abundance. 

To back up a little… we own a dog named Abby, she is a German Shepherd and a real sweet heart if you pass her inspection and criteria. She has one problem, she has fleas (or I should say, had). Now dogs often have fleas and we were not too worried about it. Get some flea stuff and get rid of them, right? At least that’s what I thought. So being a use-the-least-amount-of-chemicals-as-you-can type of person, I decided to use diatomaceous earth which is reported to be a very good flea killer and I have had good success with it in the past. That weekend Patrick and I gave Abby a good long bath, (she hates those) and when she had dried off, I rubbed the DE into her fur. She was completely white and looked quite ridiculous, but hey, at lease she would be rid of the fleas, ha. Since we were about to leave for Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania that evening  for a week of work, I sprinkled the DE all over our house just in case, of the probability, of fleas residing there. We took Abby with us since we had found a hotel that allowed pets. We left with the happy thought that any fleas in the house would certainly cut themselves on the microscopic razor blade sharpness of the diatomaceous earth and would be no more!

During the week Abby seemed to be quite relieved and feeling much better, so I was very pleased and looked forward to going home and cleaning up the DE all over the floor and being done with it.

……..(Long rabbit trail alert!)…… The Lord has led us to a new job that requires a whole lot of traveling for now. Patrick is building prefab sheds at customers homes, as a subcontractor. He now has a large truck and goose-neck trailer and two employees to work with him. He has to have a DOT (Department of Transportation) number on the truck and in order to drive that with the trailer, he has to have a health certificate. We spend the week in a hotel and come home on the weekends. Traveling is not something we really want to do, but for now this is where the Lord has us and we continue to work towards the goal and vision the Lord has given us of full time ministry.

Because of the way Patrick’s work week went, we ended up heading home on Saturday (9th) morning around 2:00 am. Patrick was absolutely exhausted from an especially grueling week of work and since we were pulling the goose-neck trailer and I don’t have my health certificate yet, I could not drive for him. So every fifteen to twenty minutes he had to pull over and sleep for fifteen to twenty minutes. We would have slept longer but we had an appointment at 9:00 am that we had to make and which could not be moved. It normally takes about an hour and a half to get to our friends house where we were dropping off the trailer, but it took a whole lot longer than that. Finally we made it and I could take over the driving. By that time I had become very tired and made it only for an hour before having to pull over, but since Patrick had slept for that hour very soundly, he was able to get us to our appointment and we were only a few minutes late. Then we had to get to a Title office to get plates for the truck which were about to expire and come to find out the only one open until noon on Saturday was a good ways away and since we had to leave for Buffalo New York on Sunday there was no other time to get them. So we took off and got there in time to get the plates, praise the Lord! Then our helper, who was riding along with us, told us that the only way he could cash his pay check was at his bank and it was closing at noon…it was quite a long way away! Off we went again and somehow we made it at 12:01 and since they saw him running for the door they let him in. Praise the Lord! Then we still had to drop him off at his home, get our mail and make it to our bank before their 1:00 pm closing time. Whew! ...... (End rabbit trail)…..

We were very thankful to the Lord and relieved when we finally made it home and were ready to get some much needed rest, before getting ready to leave on Sunday for Buffalo NY. I took Grace out of her car seat and was talking to Patrick for a moment as he brought things in from the truck, when I felt something on my leg. Looking down, I saw fleas, what seemed like millions of them, crawling and jumping up my legs!!! I ran out of the house jumping all around brushing them off, it took a little while to get them all off. Patrick grabbed the few things from the house that he had taken in and closed it up. I climbed into the truck and began to cry. It felt like too much, more than I could bear. Yet the Lord was there and He so gently took the burden from us, letting us rest in the knowledge that He knows best and is allowing this for a purpose.

We went to Patrick’s parents who very graciously let us spend the night, feeding us and everything. They are such a blessing to us! Before leaving for Buffalo we bought some house foggers and bombed the house,
chemicals or not we have to get rid of the fleas! We took Abby to our land where she would be safe and cared for. So we went to Buffalo content that the fleas would certainly be dead now.

Home again on the 16th we walked into the house to check around, I was probably in there for about one minute when I looked down at my feet and saw my white socks turning black with the tiny things, which for some reason now looked larger than they had before! Again I ran out doing the flea dance. Again we stayed at Patrick’s parents, this time until Tuesday night when we left for Buffalo.

Patrick’s Dad helped us get in contact with an exterminator who told Patrick that the reason the fleas look different this time, is because the fogger we used had birth control in it to supposedly kill the eggs and that sometimes causes the fleas to become twice their normal size! He said that he is unable to come do it himself but is sending all the sprays and things that we need to do it ourselves. So…. We will be home next week for a much anticipated break, but we don’t really have a home to go to.

I love being home, I love keeping my home and to have this happen is a great trial for me. Looking through the windows, I can see the rocker, couch, kitchen, etc. all the comforts of what we call home and it makes me cry because I cannot even walk in the door. For some reason the Lord is allowing this to happen, somehow He is using it to shape us more into the image of His Son and He will be glorified. Yet, I must say, it is not fun. Patrick’s family is so sweet and loving to us, I am so thankful to the Lord for them! So many emotions! Yet that must not be my focus, only Jesus. I pray we learn what He wants us to learn through this.

Lay not up for yourselves treasures upon earth, where moth and rust doth corrupt, and where thieves break through and steal: But lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust doth corrupt, and where thieves do not break through nor steal: For where your treasure is, there will your heart be also.
(Mat 6:19-21)

By him therefore let us offer the sacrifice of praise to God continually, that is, the fruit of our lips giving thanks to his name.
(Heb 13:15)

Praise Him even when we don’t feel like it!!!

Wednesday, July 13, 2011

Home Birth Story: Grace Tabitha

I promised to post the story of Grace’s birth and now, three months later, here it is!

When my due date on March 10th came and went without any signs of things happening I was rather disappointed. On the 8th I had four contractions thirteen minutes apart, but they did not return and so we waited. The Braxton Hicks were getting stronger and more frequent but that was it. We visited our chiropractor who found that my pelvis was pinched and something in my hips was out of line, so he did an adjustment on me and sent us home to walk. We had walked for about a mile with me doing some squats now and then, when suddenly I felt her drop. I was so excited and walked home waddling and looking much more pregnant then when we had left home, it was amazing. We were so thankful to the Lord that I had not started labor before that, since our chiropractor said that if I had it would have been a very difficult labor. We waited some more, hoping, but still nothing. At my appointment with my midwife she said that I was dilated to two centimeters but no effacement. I began to do everything I could to go into labor as one week over due came and went. I loved being pregnant but I was so very ready to be done with that part. I really had to turn to the Lord for strength to keep going and waiting, it was very hard to be patient but that was what the Lord wanted to teach us. People were telling me that I would probably go into labor on Saturday the 19th because it was a full moon, I was doubtful but wishful as well. : ) So when on that night I began having contractions, first 15 minutes apart and eventually down to 5 minutes apart for several hours, I was very hopeful. My Mom was on the phone with me talking as I walked around and around my kitchen and living room trying to keep things going as my husband slept so he could be rested. They were not hard contractions but enough to stop me in my tracks as I breathed through them, often times squatting, while my Mom helped me time them. Then they petered out and stopped. So I went to bed, disappointed, but still hopeful that things would happen soon. The next morning I began walking again and by late morning the contractions started again. I was thrilled! My sister Bonnie was very excited that I might be having my baby on her birthday. Patrick was excited now too and as the contractions continued without letting up for five hours he had me call the midwife to let her know what was going on. She decided to come see how things were going. By the time she got there they were starting to peter out again and I was still only dilated to two. She gave me some castor oil to take along with blue cohosh with instruction on dosage and she went home. That evening I did have some more contraction that were harder than they had been, but they did not last through the night. 

Several more days went by and I went to see the chiropractor again since my midwife had told us that yes, the baby had dropped but not enough. Another adjustment, some more walking and she dropped lower. We went to see my midwife again the same day and she gave me more herbs to help start labor and told me to take more castor oil. So I began taking all those things, drank cups of parsley tea, walked, squatted and waited. On Thursday the 24th I began having more contractions, but by this time I was more or less ignoring them other than doing some squats. I did not want to get my hopes up again. Then about three in the afternoon I realized “hey, these are getting really hard!” I could not ignore them anymore and in fact they were increasing in strength very quickly and I had to really concentrate on breathing through them. I looked at my husband and said with a smile “I think this is the real thing!” We decided to take a nap just in case, so we would be rested. He slept, but I sure didn’t! There was no sleeping through those contractions as they increased in strength. I got up and walked around for as long as I could and when I could stand it no longer, I climbed into bed to try to relax like the Bradley Method teaches. I was not smiling anymore. Patrick then called our midwife who said she would be there in a couple of hours. My sweet husband spent those hours and many more hours into the night heating up water in the stove to pour into the birthing pool since the water coming out of our hot water tank was discolored for some reason. He traveled back and forth from the kitchen to the bedroom carrying pot after pot of boiling water. While he waited for it to boil he would spend time coaching me through the contractions, which by this time I desperately needed his help. He also sent texts out to friends and family letting them know what was going on and asking for prayer. I finally asked him to ask the midwife to please hurry.. she did and was soon hovering over me and giving me herbs to help me relax and to get the contractions to increase. She had Patrick fill up the tub with hot water so I could get in there while I waited for the pool to get warm enough. Oh how good that water felt! It gave me the strength I needed to get through the contractions since before getting in I was beginning to feel a little panicky. 

 I took this of my husband as I labored in the tub, the love in his eyes says it all.

As I soaked in the tub I heard my midwife moaning in the living room, soon Patrick came in telling me that she had the flu! I felt so sorry for her, it had to be hard to be in a strange home helping at a birth and feeling that awful. I began to pray for her and the Lord put in my mind to tell Patrick to give her a teaspoon of Diatomaceous Earth in water. I had heard that it could help with a flu but never tried it myself. Patty(our midwife) took it and within thirty minutes was up feeling much better and a couple of hours later she had no flu symptoms at all! Praise the Lord!

All night long the contractions continued. When I was not in the pool my dear husband would rub my back through every contraction. We would sleep in between them, (at least he would, I tried to and I think that I did a little) and then I would wake him up pleading for help. I was so very thankful for him and felt bad that he could not sleep as he was exhausted, so I tried to get though them alone, but most of the time I could not. I could get through the front labor pain, but the back pain was so intense I could not bear it without his fist pressed into my back rubbing in a circular motion. When I was able to get into the tub, oh what a relief it was! I could float around into whatever position I needed and the warmth of the water on my back was so helpful, it was still not easy but more manageable. After a couple of times in and out of the pool my contractions slowed down a little so I began walking again to keep things going, the break was not for long and they soon picked up again with gusto. I don’t know the times when things happened, the hours that went by all blurred as I tried to just get through the next contraction. Patrick put on some soothing instrumental hymn cds that his mother had given us, they were very calming and comforting. I was dilating very slowly and as the morning and day (May 25th) progressed my midwife found that the warm water was causing me to swell, so I could not get back in. That was a huge disappointment! She also began to use ice to bring down the swelling which was very uncomfortable. As night fell I was getting closer to full dilatation. 

I think it was around 11:00 p.m. on my second night of labor when I finally reached full dilatation and transitioned into the pushing stage. It was a relief to be able to do something. At some point Patty broke my bag of water and I remember her saying that it looked like our baby’s birth date would be the 25th. Then a problem developed. Part of my cervix was hung up on my baby’s head and when I pushed, it would tighten up not allowing her to move down through. So Patty told me to stop pushing with the contractions but rather in between them, while she held the cervix back. Oh that was hard. She would then have me relax through them for large spaces of time, then come back and try it again. There was little to no progress for hours and I began to fear we might have to have a c-section. Which I did not want. As I lay there is complete misery, (Patrick still rubbing my back!) everything seemed dark and I really did not know how I could make it any longer. I asked the Lord “Why does it have to be this hard, many women have shorter labors.” He showed me that although I had been praying throughout, I was trying to do it myself, not consciously, but I was not fully relying on the Lord for help. By His grace I truly cast myself upon the Lord and told Him that I could not do it without Him. I pleaded with Him to help me and remembered the agony that Jesus bore for me, in my place on the cross and I thought, cannot I bear this for my child? But my strength was gone, it was then that I either imagined or saw Jesus reaching out His hand to me. I grabbed onto His hand and did not let go.

Soon Patty came in to check again and suddenly progress was being made! My baby had gone past the point where she was stuck and now things were moving quickly. I could push! Oh how strong the urge to push became… and ruthless! There was hardly any time to rest and I was exhausted. Patty began preparing things for the baby and then concentrated on talking me through each push. Soon they could see the head and Patty kept telling me to push harder, but I was so tired! Patrick then took a picture of my baby’s head, which gave me the boost I needed to give it all I had. Patrick got more and more excited as more of her head showed and kept showing me pictures which really worked to keep me motivated. My midwife had to snip a little and finally my baby’s head was out! Patrick showed me a picture of her scrunched up little face and in two more pushes which took everything left in me, she was out at 5:37 a.m. on March 26th! Praise the Lord!


 The first thing that struck me was that my baby is a girl! All throughout the pregnancy we thought that it probably was a boy, so we were amazed to see our little girl. She was pink and screaming and as Patty laid her on my chest she began to suck her fist, so I decided to try nursing her right away and sure enough she latched on and wanted both sides! I was so thankful that she could get that good colostrum in her little body. We left the umbilical cord attached for about 45 minutes until in stopped pulsating then Patrick cut it. He was then able to hold his little girl for the first time! I cannot describe the joy it was to see our baby in her Daddy’s arms and the amazed look on my husband’s face! The Lord is so good! It took a while to get the placenta out but once it was finally out, oh it was such a relief! Patty took Grace to bathe and weigh her while I rested. She weighed in at 8lbs. 3oz. and was 19 ½ inches long. Patty could not get over her color, how pink she was (and still is :).  She told me that I could not get up until much later that day since I had lost about five to six cups of blood and anything over four is considered a hemorrhage. 

 Bonding :)

 First bath

 My parents were already packed and ready to travel down from Wisconsin to stay with us for a while, so they soon began their 14 hour drive. Patrick’s family came to meet the new arrival, bearing presents and food. My sister-in-love Leah stayed for the night to help us, which was a great blessing. I would almost faint standing up from lack of blood, so they both would support me whenever I had to get up. A friend brought over all kinds of good iron building foods which I began to eat and slowly the color came back into my cheeks after several days. My parents arrived on Sunday and stayed for over a week. It was such a HUGE blessing having them there! My Mom took care of meals, housework, laundry, etc., babysat Grace so that I could sleep and just blessed us tremendously. My Dad helped Patrick out with numerous projects and fixed a drawer in my kitchen that had to be completely rebuilt! They did not leave until I was able to pick Grace up and carry her around the house. Before that time I would get dizzy and begin to topple over. I am so thankful to the Lord for their love and kindness to us!

Happy Grandpa

 Happy Nana

 During the time of my darkest moments, especially in the second night of labor, I did not realize just how many people were praying for me. It blows me away to think how many people slept very little that night as the Lord burdened their hearts to pray! My parents were in agony, crying before the Lord as they waited for more news and none came hour after hour. Patrick sent out several texts, but the last they received before the happy call about the birth was that the baby was stuck. It makes me cry now to think of their prayers. Oh how thankful I am that the Lord had so many people praying and that He answered their prayers in a mighty way! I did not have the strength, but He gave it to me, I could not go on, but he lifted me up and set me on a Rock, Jesus my Savior! Thank you Lord Jesus! All glory goes to my Lord!

 Foot stamping

 Grace amazed us by holding her head up off of our shoulders from day 1, strong little girl!

 Very happy Mommy :)

 Our precious little girl, such a gift from God.
My sister-in-love Olivia crocheted this hat for Grace.

Now my little girl is three months old! It is hard to believe, she is growing so very quickly!

A woman when she is in travail has sorrow, because her hour is come: but as soon as she is delivered of the child, she remembers no more the anguish, for joy that a man is born into the world.
(John 16:21)


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