Life!

So much for me posting more often :) Life gets busy and training even one little girl is a great task and responsibility from our Heavenly Father. So the blog can wait...even the dishes can wait if need be, except for the fact that they are part of the training. :) Grace now can stand on a chair beside me and "help" do the dishes, cook, bake, clean. Whatever I am doing I try to include her. It is not always easy and I am by no means doing so all the time or even as much as I would like to, but it really amazes me how much the Lord keeps reminding me..."why are you doing this by yourself?" It also is a great encouragement to see how happy she is when working along side me, she is just bubbling with excitement over being included in real life! Oh how we pray for her that she will come to love and serve our Lord Jesus Christ at an early age, that He would save her and bring much glory to His worthy name through her life! We also pray this for our dear little one who is now due in less than a week!

I have been "nesting" for several weeks now, changing things around in our home with my husbands help....I should rephrase that... Patrick changes things around while I point where I would like them to go. :) He is so wonderful and uncomplaining about my sudden ideas, and usually refines them to a better way of managing our space, or comes up with his own. I am truly blessed to be married to such a great man! We are so excited as we wait to meet our little boy or girl, though I am somewhat nervous about the labor since Grace's was so long. Yet I know the Lord will give me the strength for whatever He allows, I just cannot dwell on it too much, just trust in Him who does all things well.

Grace loves babies! Every morning she has to greet her three baby dolls with squeals of delight and exclamations of "baby! baby!" She cares for them so lovingly, rocking, singing and changing them. We really look forward to how she will be with her little brother or sister, it will be such fun to watch! I have to run, but here are a few random pictures.....

Home Birth Story: Grace Tabitha

I promised to post the story of Grace’s birth and now, three months later, here it is!

When my due date on March 10^th came and went without any signs of things happening I was rather disappointed. On the 8^th I had four contractions thirteen minutes apart, but they did not return and so we waited. The Braxton Hicks were getting stronger and more frequent but that was it. We visited our chiropractor who found that my pelvis was pinched and something in my hips was out of line, so he did an adjustment on me and sent us home to walk. We had walked for about a mile with me doing some squats now and then, when suddenly I felt her drop. I was so excited and walked home waddling and looking much more pregnant then when we had left home, it was amazing. We were so thankful to the Lord that I had not started labor before that, since our chiropractor said that if I had it would have been a very difficult labor. We waited some more, hoping, but still nothing. At my appointment with my midwife she said that I was dilated to two centimeters but no effacement. I began to do everything I could to go into labor as one week over due came and went. I loved being pregnant but I was so very ready to be done with that part. I really had to turn to the Lord for strength to keep going and waiting, it was very hard to be patient but that was what the Lord wanted to teach us. People were telling me that I would probably go into labor on Saturday the 19^th because it was a full moon, I was doubtful but wishful as well. : ) So when on that night I began having contractions, first 15 minutes apart and eventually down to 5 minutes apart for several hours, I was very hopeful. My Mom was on the phone with me talking as I walked around and around my kitchen and living room trying to keep things going as my husband slept so he could be rested. They were not hard contractions but enough to stop me in my tracks as I breathed through them, often times squatting, while my Mom helped me time them. Then they petered out and stopped. So I went to bed, disappointed, but still hopeful that things would happen soon. The next morning I began walking again and by late morning the contractions started again. I was thrilled! My sister Bonnie was very excited that I might be having my baby on her birthday. Patrick was excited now too and as the contractions continued without letting up for five hours he had me call the midwife to let her know what was going on. She decided to come see how things were going. By the time she got there they were starting to peter out again and I was still only dilated to two. She gave me some castor oil to take along with blue cohosh with instruction on dosage and she went home. That evening I did have some more contraction that were harder than they had been, but they did not last through the night. 

Several more days went by and I went to see the chiropractor again since my midwife had told us that yes, the baby had dropped but not enough. Another adjustment, some more walking and she dropped lower. We went to see my midwife again the same day and she gave me more herbs to help start labor and told me to take more castor oil. So I began taking all those things, drank cups of parsley tea, walked, squatted and waited. On Thursday the 24^th I began having more contractions, but by this time I was more or less ignoring them other than doing some squats. I did not want to get my hopes up again. Then about three in the afternoon I realized “hey, these are getting really hard!” I could not ignore them anymore and in fact they were increasing in strength very quickly and I had to really concentrate on breathing through them. I looked at my husband and said with a smile “I think this is the real thing!” We decided to take a nap just in case, so we would be rested. He slept, but I sure didn’t! There was no sleeping through those contractions as they increased in strength. I got up and walked around for as long as I could and when I could stand it no longer, I climbed into bed to try to relax like the Bradley Method teaches. I was not smiling anymore. Patrick then called our midwife who said she would be there in a couple of hours. My sweet husband spent those hours and many more hours into the night heating up water in the stove to pour into the birthing pool since the water coming out of our hot water tank was discolored for some reason. He traveled back and forth from the kitchen to the bedroom carrying pot after pot of boiling water. While he waited for it to boil he would spend time coaching me through the contractions, which by this time I desperately needed his help. He also sent texts out to friends and family letting them know what was going on and asking for prayer. I finally asked him to ask the midwife to please hurry.. she did and was soon hovering over me and giving me herbs to help me relax and to get the contractions to increase. She had Patrick fill up the tub with hot water so I could get in there while I waited for the pool to get warm enough. Oh how good that water felt! It gave me the strength I needed to get through the contractions since before getting in I was beginning to feel a little panicky. 

 I took this of my husband as I labored in the tub, the love in his eyes says it all.

As I soaked in the tub I heard my midwife moaning in the living room, soon Patrick came in telling me that she had the flu! I felt so sorry for her, it had to be hard to be in a strange home helping at a birth and feeling that awful. I began to pray for her and the Lord put in my mind to tell Patrick to give her a teaspoon of Diatomaceous Earth in water. I had heard that it could help with a flu but never tried it myself. Patty(our midwife) took it and within thirty minutes was up feeling much better and a couple of hours later she had no flu symptoms at all! Praise the Lord!

All night long the contractions continued. When I was not in the pool my dear husband would rub my back through every contraction. We would sleep in between them, (at least he would, I tried to and I think that I did a little) and then I would wake him up pleading for help. I was so very thankful for him and felt bad that he could not sleep as he was exhausted, so I tried to get though them alone, but most of the time I could not. I could get through the front labor pain, but the back pain was so intense I could not bear it without his fist pressed into my back rubbing in a circular motion. When I was able to get into the tub, oh what a relief it was! I could float around into whatever position I needed and the warmth of the water on my back was so helpful, it was still not easy but more manageable. After a couple of times in and out of the pool my contractions slowed down a little so I began walking again to keep things going, the break was not for long and they soon picked up again with gusto. I don’t know the times when things happened, the hours that went by all blurred as I tried to just get through the next contraction. Patrick put on some soothing instrumental hymn cds that his mother had given us, they were very calming and comforting. I was dilating very slowly and as the morning and day (May 25th) progressed my midwife found that the warm water was causing me to swell, so I could not get back in. That was a huge disappointment! She also began to use ice to bring down the swelling which was very uncomfortable. As night fell I was getting closer to full dilatation. 

I think it was around 11:00 p.m. on my second night of labor when I finally reached full dilatation and transitioned into the pushing stage. It was a relief to be able to do something. At some point Patty broke my bag of water and I remember her saying that it looked like our baby’s birth date would be the 25^th. Then a problem developed. Part of my cervix was hung up on my baby’s head and when I pushed, it would tighten up not allowing her to move down through. So Patty told me to stop pushing with the contractions but rather in between them, while she held the cervix back. Oh that was hard. She would then have me relax through them for large spaces of time, then come back and try it again. There was little to no progress for hours and I began to fear we might have to have a c-section. Which I did not want. As I lay there is complete misery, (Patrick still rubbing my back!) everything seemed dark and I really did not know how I could make it any longer. I asked the Lord “Why does it have to be this hard, many women have shorter labors.” He showed me that although I had been praying throughout, I was trying to do it myself, not consciously, but I was not fully relying on the Lord for help. By His grace I truly cast myself upon the Lord and told Him that I could not do it without Him. I pleaded with Him to help me and remembered the agony that Jesus bore for me, in my place on the cross and I thought, cannot I bear this for my child? But my strength was gone, it was then that I either imagined or saw Jesus reaching out His hand to me. I grabbed onto His hand and did not let go.

Soon Patty came in to check again and suddenly progress was being made! My baby had gone past the point where she was stuck and now things were moving quickly. I could push! Oh how strong the urge to push became… and ruthless! There was hardly any time to rest and I was exhausted. Patty began preparing things for the baby and then concentrated on talking me through each push. Soon they could see the head and Patty kept telling me to push harder, but I was so tired! Patrick then took a picture of my baby’s head, which gave me the boost I needed to give it all I had. Patrick got more and more excited as more of her head showed and kept showing me pictures which really worked to keep me motivated. My midwife had to snip a little and finally my baby’s head was out! Patrick showed me a picture of her scrunched up little face and in two more pushes which took everything left in me, she was out at 5:37 a.m. on March 26^th! Praise the Lord!

 Joy!!!

 The first thing that struck me was that my baby is a girl! All throughout the pregnancy we thought that it probably was a boy, so we were amazed to see our little girl. She was pink and screaming and as Patty laid her on my chest she began to suck her fist, so I decided to try nursing her right away and sure enough she latched on and wanted both sides! I was so thankful that she could get that good colostrum in her little body. We left the umbilical cord attached for about 45 minutes until in stopped pulsating then Patrick cut it. He was then able to hold his little girl for the first time! I cannot describe the joy it was to see our baby in her Daddy’s arms and the amazed look on my husband’s face! The Lord is so good! It took a while to get the placenta out but once it was finally out, oh it was such a relief! Patty took Grace to bathe and weigh her while I rested. She weighed in at 8lbs. 3oz. and was 19 ½ inches long. Patty could not get over her color, how pink she was (and still is :).  She told me that I could not get up until much later that day since I had lost about five to six cups of blood and anything over four is considered a hemorrhage. 

 Bonding :)

 First bath

 My parents were already packed and ready to travel down from Wisconsin to stay with us for a while, so they soon began their 14 hour drive. Patrick’s family came to meet the new arrival, bearing presents and food. My sister-in-love Leah stayed for the night to help us, which was a great blessing. I would almost faint standing up from lack of blood, so they both would support me whenever I had to get up. A friend brought over all kinds of good iron building foods which I began to eat and slowly the color came back into my cheeks after several days. My parents arrived on Sunday and stayed for over a week. It was such a HUGE blessing having them there! My Mom took care of meals, housework, laundry, etc., babysat Grace so that I could sleep and just blessed us tremendously. My Dad helped Patrick out with numerous projects and fixed a drawer in my kitchen that had to be completely rebuilt! They did not leave until I was able to pick Grace up and carry her around the house. Before that time I would get dizzy and begin to topple over. I am so thankful to the Lord for their love and kindness to us!

 

Happy Grandpa

 Happy Nana

 During the time of my darkest moments, especially in the second night of labor, I did not realize just how many people were praying for me. It blows me away to think how many people slept very little that night as the Lord burdened their hearts to pray! My parents were in agony, crying before the Lord as they waited for more news and none came hour after hour. Patrick sent out several texts, but the last they received before the happy call about the birth was that the baby was stuck. It makes me cry now to think of their prayers. Oh how thankful I am that the Lord had so many people praying and that He answered their prayers in a mighty way! I did not have the strength, but He gave it to me, I could not go on, but he lifted me up and set me on a Rock, Jesus my Savior! Thank you Lord Jesus! All glory goes to my Lord!

 Foot stamping

 Grace amazed us by holding her head up off of our shoulders from day 1, strong little girl!

 Very happy Mommy :)

 Our precious little girl, such a gift from God.

My sister-in-love Olivia crocheted this hat for Grace.

Now my little girl is three months old! It is hard to believe, she is growing so very quickly!

 

A woman when she is in travail has sorrow, because her hour is come: but as soon as she is delivered of the child, she remembers no more the anguish, for joy that a man is born into the world.
(John 16:21)

What has been going on over here?

My dear Mother has been sick for three weeks now...earlier this week her symptoms changed for the worse, so she wet to the doctor yesterday. They ran more tests, and finally decided that even though the result came back negative, she does have Lyme disease. This is transmitted by the bite of a deer tick, which we have up here. These ticks are the size of a pin head, very hard to spot, and are carriers of several diseases. Now my Mom is on antibiotics for three weeks, prayerfully this is "in time". If left untreated for long, this disease begins to effect the neurological system. As it is my Mom has been in a lot of pain, but she can tell a slight difference now after taking two doses of the meds. Please do pray for her recovery, and thank you so much to those who have been praying. Praise God that they were able to find out what was wrong!

I have been *very* busy taking care of things here. Harvesting and preserving, caring for (with my brother's help) almost 150 chickens, caring for the family, etc. My Grandma has been a huge blessing to me as she washes all of the dishes, not a small task, as I cook meals from scratch and use lots of pots and pans in the food preservation process.

So now you know where I have been and will be...

Keep close to Jesus!

I will be glad and rejoice in thee: I will sing praise to thy
name, O thou most High. (Psalm 9:2)

Birthday

It is my twenty-first birthday today, it's kind of scary getting so old. :-)

My dear family gave me some beautiful gifts:

I love to collect books for my future children to read. Except for the red one whose title you cannot see, these are all books that I have read and loved as a child, the hidden one is "Jack Archer" by G.A. Henty. I LOVE the rolling pin, it is an older one, which makes me very happy!

Close up of the watch.

My meditation today:

And not only so, but we glory in tribulations also: knowing that tribulation works patience; And patience, experience; and experience, hope: And hope makes not ashamed; because the love of God is shed abroad in our hearts by the Holy Spirit who is given unto us. (Romans 5:3-5)

As I read these verses today, the question arose, why does experience give us hope? I think is because, through experience we learn to trust the faithfulness of God. When we go through hard things and He proves Himself faithful, we now know through experience what before was only head knowledge. We then have hope for the future, that He who has called us is faithful and will keep our whole spirit, soul and body preserved blameless unto the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ. (1Thes. 5:23-24)

From Pilgrims Progress: Christiana... "Our only fear for the future, is that we will forget how God hath led us in the past."

Learning to Wait on God for Marriage

As a young lady seeking to serve my Lord Jesus Christ, the Lord has shown me the joy and blessing of Biblical Woman-hood. Ever since I was very young, I have prayed for the man God would some day bring into my life for marriage and I prayed and still do, that we will have as many children as God will give us - twelve or more has been the number I put before Him. Growing up into a young lady I have struggled, as I am sure we all do, with the concept of waiting. What if he never comes, what will I do then? What if he comes when I am older, will my life have been wasted? Should I go to college and get a job while I wait? All these questions and more have swarmed through my head.

From what I have read from other godly young ladies, these are common to our kind. But what is the answer? What should we do as we wait? I know that this topic has been covered many times before, but I would like to share some of the things God has taught me.

First of all let me make mention that there are many godly woman out there who have gone to collage and others who feel they are led to go, or their fathers want them to go. Please know that I am not saying that is wrong. God leads each person differently to best get glory for Himself through their life. Each of us stands before God for what we do and do not do, we are the Lord's. With that said, I do believe that the model of woman in the Bible is that woman stay at home, as helpers for their parents and later helpmeets to their husbands. (Titus 2:5) (Gen. 3:16) etc.

"Seek first the Kingdom of God and His righteousness and all these things shall be added unto you." Matt. 6:33

These years of our lives are so precious! We have time right now to seek the Lord, to get to know our Savior and to seek to please Him. (1 Cor. 7:34)

We can learn to abide in Him, living with Christ daily. (John 15: )

We can learn to be a servant of Jesus. (Matt. 10:43-44)

At this time in our lives, our hearts are solely the Lord's. There is no competition for our love and devotion. We are His and He is ours. Here we learn to delight in His presence and to listen to His voice. We are fulfilled in Jesus and He is our life. No one is taking our attention away from our Redeemer, we are at His service to do as He pleases. This is a joyful place to be!

As young ladies at home under our Father's roof, we can be corner pillars polished like a palace! (Psa. 144:12) We are helpers to our Father and Mother, servants for the Lord. What a blessing it is to be quietly working for our family, our worth and work unseen by the world. Working only for the eyes of the One in whom we delight. No wonder the world scoffs at us! No wonder they ridicule and try to make us look stupid, lazy and weak. They cannot see what God sees! They cannot see the jewel He is creating in us, the rose that is forming beneath the surface! Sisters, we are God's and our work is for His eyes! Give no head to the world. They scoffed at Jesus, they called his life and death a waste and we are not greater than our Lord. (John 15:20)

As daughters keeping at home, we are giving glory to God. We are proclaiming by our actions that His way is best, that He is worthy to have our lives and that we can entrust Him with our very breath, it is not a waste when spent in His service. We can be confident that no matter how menial the task, if it is "as unto the Lord", it is no waste! (Col. 3:23-24)

"And he (Jesus) said unto them, 'Go you into all the world, and preach the gospel to every creature.'" Mark 16:15

Sisters, we can obey this command! Ask God to prepare you to give His glorious Gospel of peace. (Eph. 6: ) He is the One who can make you ready. Draw near to Him, seek His face, read His word and learn to love His gospel! Pray for the people that He will bring your way and ask for opportunities to share the gospel with them and pray for boldness. If I may add here, perhaps an often overlooked opportunity is your brothers and sisters? They are your first mission field and even the very smallest can be taught the Bible and through play many good things can be instilled in their small minds. We need to ask God to open our eyes to the opportunities we are missing. Finally trust that God is the one who will do the changing of hearts and minds, we are only to obey.

There are so many practical things we can do as daughters at home, one thing that has worked out for me to do, to help my family, is to grow much of the food we eat. For others it may be something different, seek God for the answer and ask your parents what you can do that would be the most helpful to them.

"What? know you not that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have of God, and you are not your own? For you are bought with a price: therefore glorify God in your body, and in you spirit, which are God's." 1 Cor. 6:19-20

"So likewise you, when you shall have done all those things which are commanded you, say, We are unprofitable servants: we have done that which was our duty to do." Luke 17:10

Perhaps all this sounds simple, to my ears it does, but I think it ought to be simple. Pray, pray and pray for wisdom, we are bombarded on every side by the world. To them, life is complicated, they are trying to make sense of their lives outside of Christ. For us, our lives make sense and we have a very simple goal, to glorify God.


Here is a poem which has helped me greatly with the concept of waiting.

Desperately, helplessly, longingly I cried.

Quietly, patiently, lovingly, God replied.

I pled and I wept for a clue to my fate.

And the Master so gently said, "Child, you must wait."

"WAIT? You say, 'wait,'" my indignant reply.
"Lord I need answers, I need to know why!
By faith I have asked and I'm claiming your word.
My future and all to which I relate
Hangs in a balance and YOU tell me to 'WAIT?'
I'm needing a 'yes', a go-ahead sign,
Or even a 'no', to which I resign.
And Lord, you promised that if we believe,
We need to ask and we shall receive.
And Lord, I've been asking! I need a reply!"

Then quietly, softly I learned of my fate,
As the Master replied once again, "You must wait."

So I slumped in my chair defeated and taunt
And grumbled to God, "So I'm waiting...for what?"

He seemed then to kneel, and His eyes wept with mine,
And He tenderly said, "I could give you a sign,
I could shake the heavens and darken the sun,
I could raise the dead, cause mountains to run.
All you seek I could give, and pleased you would be.
You would have what you want, but you wouldn't Know Me.

You'd not know the depth of My love for each saint;
You'd not know the power I give to the faint;
You'd not learn to trust Me, just knowing I'm there.
You'd not know the joy of resting in Me
When darkness and silence were all you could see.
You'd never experience the fullness of love,
As the peace of My Spirit descends like a dove.

You'd know that I give and save (for a start)
But you'd not know the depth of the beat of My heart.
The glow of My comfort late in the night,
The faith that I give when you walk without sight.
The depth that's beyond getting just what you ask,
Of an infinite God, who makes what you have LAST.
You'd never know, should your pain quickly flee,
What it means that, 'My grace is sufficient for thee.'
Yes, you dreams for that loved one overnight would come true,
But oh, the loss! If I lost what I'm doing in You!

So, be silent, My child, and in time you will see
That the greatest of gifts is to get to know ME.
And though oft, My answer seems terribly late,
My most precious answer of all is still, 'WAIT'."

--Author Unknown


Let us abide in and delight in Christ!